BARNEY

2000AD
JUDGE DREDD

in

OLD PALS' ACT

(6 pages)

Script: ALAN GRANT Art: CAM KENNEDY Lettering:

 

PAGES 1 and 2

1. Mega-City One.Day. Longish shot. Exterior view of the JAY SILVERHEELS CONDO. Judge Dreddis riding his bike up the steps leading into the building. There’s a(legal) street market in progress at the side of the condo building;

we don’t need to see it now, but we’llbe visiting it later.

CAPTION: YOU’RE NOT THE LAW, JOE. I AM.

 

2. Interior, condo. Grim Dredd rides his bike along acorridor flanked with apartment doors. There’s some faded grafitti on awall: CHOPPER FOR OZ, with the famous smiley face.

CAP: YOUWERE NOTHING WITHOUT ME. I BIRTHED YOU,NOURISHED YOU, POLISHED YOU

UP, KEPT YOU GOING WHEN TIMES WERE HARD.

 

3. Viewed from behind Dredd. He’s stopped his bike outside aparticular door, its nameplate unreadable here. Dredd’s bike cannon openfire at the door, BAMBAMBAMBAM!, blasting it off its hinges.

CAP: I MADE YOU THE BEST THERE IS. THETOUGHEST, MOST LAW-ABIDING ROUGHNECK

COP THIS CITY’S EVER SEEN.

 

4. Close shot, low angle. We see part of the Lawmaster, andDredd’s boot. But the main focus of the panel is the nameplate from theblasted apt. door, which lies on the ground next to Dredd’s boot. Itreads: J. WAGNER.

CAP: GAVE YOU A NICE LINE IN ONE-LINERS, TOO, Eh, JOE?

DREDD BLN: ANYBODYHOME?

 

5. Interior, Wagner’s apartment. John Wagner - as he is now;please make him recognisable - is sitting in an old-fashioned bathtub fullof soapy water in the centre of the living room. He’s naked, sittingreading in the bath - the book he’s reading is BUTTON MAN.He looks up to see Dredd, still seated on his bike, framed in the apt.doorway. The bath-tub has some hi-tek additions to it, which we’lldiscover shortly. The apartment walls are lined with comic posters,for:

STRONTIUM DOG, ROBOHUNTER, AL’SBABY, BUTTON MAN, ACE TRUCKING Co., BAD CITY BLUE, THE MEAN TEAM,HELL-TREK, THE BALLS BROTHERS, and any other stories John might havewritten/co-written for 2000AD (***REFS required for artist.)

CAP: I ALWAYS KNEW YOU’D COME FOR ME ONE DAY, JOE--

DREDD: JOHN WAGNER - a.k.a. JOHNHOWARD, a.k.a. T.B. GROVER,a.k.a. RON CLARK, RICK

CLARK, F. MARTIN CANDOR ANDSUNDRY OTHERS--

LINK: YOU’RE UNDER ARREST, CREEP!

 

6. Seen from behind Wagner, staring at Dredd.

DREDD: CHARGES INCLUDE INCITING VIOLENCE THROUGH DISTURBING IMAGERY - USING

BANNED STIMULANTS, NAMELYCAFFEINE - AND NICOTINEABUSE.

LINK: GET OUT OF THE BATH, WAGNER!

 

7. Same shot, only now Dredd has drawn hisLawgiver gun and points it at Wagner. One of Wagner’s hands movessurreptitiously towards a small electronic control panel set in the bathrim next to him.

CAP: I KNOW YOU TOO WELL, JOE. I MADE YOU. I CAN PREDICT YOUR EVERY MOVE. YOU

CAN NEVERGET ONE OVER ON ME--

DREDD: I SAID GET OUT OF THE BATH!

 

8. Wagner’s hand has depressed a control stud. Twinmachine guns built into the end of the bath closest to Dredd suddenly openfire. SHAKO-SHAKO-SHAKO-SHAKO! Dredd dives off his bike as shots burst allaround him.

CAP: SEE?

 

PAGE 3

1. Dredd is on the apt. floor, loosingoff a couple of shots, BLAM! BLAM! But Wagner has hit another controlstud; rockets at the rear of the bath flare into life, WOWFF!, ripping thebath from its fittings and pipes, SHRIPP! The bathtub swivels,heading towards the room window.

DREDD: DROKK! HE’SGOING TO MAKE A CLEAN GETAWAY!

 

2.Exterior view of the condo. The rocket-propelled bathtub comes bursting outthrough the apt window. CRAASH!

WAGNER: SAYONARA, JOE!

 

3. Much the largest on the page, two-thirds of the pageif possible. The rocket-powered bathtub comes swooping down towards theground, where the previously mentioned street market is in progress. Lotsof stalls of different kinds, including BLAND COMIX. We mightsee a large advertising poster-billboard: GREAT NEW COMPU-GAME! MEAN TEAMversus HELL-TREK! Above and behind, Dredd - now back on his bike -comes soaring out of the window in hot pursuit. He might be shooting again,his shots ricocheting off the bathtub (but of course causingno harm to any innocent market traders or shoppers, who look up inalarm).

DREDD: YOU CAN ADD ATTEMPTED ESCAPE TO THE LIST--

LINK: NOT FORGETTING PUBLIC NUDITY!

 

PAGES 4 and 5

1. OnWagner in the bathtub as it swoops down to land, shearing off the top ofthe BLAND COMIX stall. This stall exhibits posters advertising CUDDLY WEEANIMAL COMIX, HEROIC NICE GUY COMIX, JUDGE PAL COMIX, etc. There are highstacks of the various comics concerned, starting to sway andwobble. The stall-holder is concerned.

WAGNER: CLEAR THE WAY! WRITER COMING THROUGH!

 

2. On Dredd as his bike lands in the same place. The wobbling stacksof comics fall down. The bathtub can be seen in background, zooming off onhover-jets about a foot above the ground.

DREDD: CLEAR THE WAY!JUDGE COMING THROUGH!

 

3. On Dredd, pausing tolook at what’s been uncovered by the fallen comic stacks - behind themare smaller stacks, with labels like HEAVY VI COMIX, ULTRA VI COMIX, PUREWAGNER VI COMIX etc. The stallholder, a typical comicshop type, realisinghe’s been rumbled, starts to flee the scene.

STALLHOLDER: DAMN! HE’S ONTO ME!

 

4. Using hisLawgiver, Dredd shoots the running stallholder in the leg. BLAM! BLAM! Hefalls sprawling, crashing into another stall - BOYES’ TOYS, which isselling models of Wagner-created characters (see Page 2 for list).

DREDD: LEG-SHOT!

 

5. The injuredstallholder lies on the ground in foreground, looking down at his leg indisbelief - it’s been shot off just above the knee, leaving a bloodystump. Dredd calls out to him as he wheels away to continue the chase.

DREDD: DON’T GO AWAY. I’LL BE BACK FOR YOU!

 

6. Focus on Wagner in the hovering bathtub as it startsto take off into the air again, customers and stallholders leaping ordiving aside for safety. In background, we see pursuing Dredd, loosing offa salvo of shots after it. BLAMBLAM!

DREDD TH: THESE ROCKETS HAVETO BE WATER-POWERED--

 

7. On Wagner in the bathtub, 20 feet up in the air. He looksover the side of the tub at several bullet-holes made by Dredd’s shots.Soapy water is pouring out of them.

WAGNER: Uh-oh!

 

8. Longish shot, as the bathtub goes into a tailspinand crashes down into the WORLD OF FANTASY stall.

NO DIALOG.

 

9. Wagner and thesmashed bathtub lie sprawled in the wreckage of the stall. Wagner looksworriedly towards Dredd, now advancing towards him on foot, gun aimed readyto fire.

DREDD: THERE’S NO ESCAPEFROM THE LAW, CREEP - NOT EVEN IN THE WORLD OF FANTASY!

WAGNER: N-NO!DON’T SHOOT!

 

10. Close on Wagner’spleading face. Dredd’s gun barrel juts menacingly into panel, aimed atWagner’s head.

WAGNER: PLEASE, JOE! WE’RE OLD PALS!

LINK: I MADE YOU WHAT YOU ARE TODAY!

 

11. Upshot, close. Dredd’s gun barrel in close foreground,firing several times, BLAMBLAMBLAM! We can see Dredd’s grim face, too;no mercy there.

DREDD: AND NOW YOU HAVE TO PAY THE PRICE!

 

PAGE 6

1. Cut to extreme close shot of an EEG brainread-out. It’s going crazy. Very small panel.

BLN OOV: WAGNER’S GOING OFF THE SCALE AGAIN!

 

2.Pull back, to reveal we’re in a storage lab. In close foreground is alarge clear bell jar containing a human brain floating in liquid nutrients.The jar has several tubes running into and out of it, connected to variousmonitoring equipment. A label on the jar reads JOHN WAGNER.Two lab assistants are by the jar; one of them is looking at it, and theother is starting to fill a hypo syringe from a bottle labelled TRANQ. Inbackground we see that the room is lined with shelves, with dozens of otherbottled brains standing on them.

LAB GUY: WONDER WHAT THEOLD COOT DREAMS ABOUT TO GET HIMSELF WORKEDUP

LIKE THIS..?

 

3. Same, a different view. The first labguy continues to study the brain and its excited EEG read-out, while theother holds up the syringe, ejecting a few test droplets of tranq.

LABGUY: THEY SAY HE WAS A CLEVER GUY. USED THE MONEY HE MADE FROM WRITINGTO

PRESERVE HIS BRAIN AFTER DEATH,UNTIL HE COULD EARN ENOUGH TO BUY A

NEW BODY.

OTHER: TRANQREADY!

LAB GUY 2: HE FORGOT ONE THING, THOUGH--

 

4. Close shot. The second lab assistant has taken thelid off the jar, and is injecting the tranq directly into the preservedbrain. Still studying the brain, his colleague looks wry.

LAB GUY: BRAINS CAN’T WRITE. THEY AIN’T GOT NOHANDS!

 

5.Very small panel, same as panel 1 on this page, only now the EEG reading isback to normality. NO DIALOG.

 

6.Final shot, close on the brain in the jar. It seems to be looking out ofthe panel at us.

CAPTION: HELLO?

CAP: CAN ANYBODY OUTTHERE HEAR ME..?

 

THE END